Monday, July 19, 2010

Another fill another day.

I have been so busy and felt very guilty that I haven't updated lately. So, here goes.

I had my appointment for a fill on July 8th. I went in thinking that at most I would just get a little fill if at all. I still hadn't been able to eat much food and I got stuck alot. It was not fun. If I wasn't stuck I was sliming all over, which does not make for a good day.

Jeanine and I talked about what we thought should happen and she decided that maybe I should have a little more taken out. I really had not been able to eat any meat - I was living on soft foods and protein shakes. I really want to be able to eat as normal as possible, but much smaller quantities and that just wasn't happening the last time even with all my un-fills.

So, Jeanine took out about .40 cc(which I think brought me down to about 3.80 or 3.90 ccs in my band) and told me to go and eat some protein. Which I did - and then a little more. I felt so much better and I could eat without the terrible side effects of a too tight band. It was very nice, well maybe too nice.

When I was weighed on the 8th I had only lost about 4 more pounds from the last time I had been unfilled(the Monday at the Clinton office). I know that it is a good amount but considering what I had been losing with my first fill I was a little disappointed. And now that I had less restriction, I was eating more than 1/2 to one cup of food. I knew that it would not be good if I didn't get a little more added to my band.

On July 12th I called the office and asked if I could get in for a small fill, they had an opening on Thursday morning so I just had to be careful what I ate between Monday and Thursday. I did not want to gain any of what I had worked so hard to lose. I bumped up my exercise some more and tried to drink liquids when I was hungry. And I was hungry. I hadn't felt hungry since a little after my surgery. It was strange, I really do love my Band. I like the no hunger part the best and feeling hungry in the evenings was not what I wanted.

I made it to the 15th without too much difficulty, although I was a little hesitant to get on the scale. I don't know if I gained or I lost - I don't remember what my weight was when I was there on the 8th.

Jeanine came in and we talked about how much I should get. I really just wanted to get up to where I was after my first fill. I felt that amount of restriction was just right for me. I got .20 cc's put in my band and was hoping it was enough.

I felt good and nothing was getting stuck or I wasn't sliming too much. (I really still need to slow down my eating).

This morning I weighed and I am down 4 pounds from last Thursday's weigh in. I am eating enough protein and veggies and my body is one happy camper. Who would of thought that I may have reached my "sweet spot" on my first fill - and we fiddled with it when it didn't need fiddling with. Karen told me that I just may be one of those people who are sensitive to the band and don't need much added. That would be fine by me.

I am still exercising one half hour in the morning and an hour at night and I feel so good when I do that. Exercise is definitely becoming my friend. My friend Lisa and I walk every evening with the dogs, catching up about our days and enjoying the summer weather. It is very nice to spend that time with her and be outdoors. I would never have thought even six months ago, that I would enjoy walking and exercising as much as I do now.

My clothes are starting to get really baggy and I will probably need to buy some soon, but I hope to wait it out until I need cooler weather clothes. A belt is definitely in order most days now. I just tried on a pair of sweats and they fell down, yeah me.

I am just so happy that I am on this journey. Yes, there are days when it is hard. I wish that I could still eat some foods that I know will no longer work in my life (My sister Mona's homemade rolls), but in the end I have to end my love affair with food. That is part of the reason that I was as heavy as I was. Food means love to me and I always wanted to feel loved. I can live without rolls and other breads and I will live longer because of it.

If you are reading this because you are thinking of the band, then I say "Go For It" life is for living not eating. If you are doing the same journey as me, you understand what I am saying. So, have a great night and tell your family how much you love them. We are not guaranteed tomorrow - so let them know today that they are the loves of your life.

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Hello, anybody out there?

I am sorry that I haven't written much lately, life has been a little busy.

I definitely did not feel well after my second fill and it really took me a while to get back in the swing of things. I actually thought that I was going to have to go back and have more taken out. I didn't have too and I am grateful for that.

My next fill is next Thursday. I forgot the date and scheduled a Pampered Chef Party for the same night. So, I will be having people over and not eating anything that is fixed. Generally, after a fill I am not hungry for a while so that will take the temptation away. Plus laughing with your friends is just as good as eating.

I think for this next fill I am only going to get a 1/4 cc and see how I do, that is if they let me do that. Then make another appointment for only two weeks out and see if I can handle more.

For the two weeks after my fill, I really had no energy and slacked off on exercising. I know that I shouldn't have, but I just couldn't do it. I am now back to exercising daily and the scale has started moving again. I am down two pounds in the last two days. Let's see if it goes back down tomorrow.

So, the lesson that I have learned is this: If I do not exercise, I will not lose weight. Very simple, but very true. I have to move for at least 60 minutes a day to get the reward of the scale going down. I can do that, just put my mind to it and realize I have to help the band help me.

Friends are asking if I regret the band considering the problems I have had lately. I answer them - it's not easy but it is the best thing I can do for myself. The band is my partner and I have to show it the respect it deserves. And as a partner I have to carry my end of the bargain and that is movement.

That ah-hah moment is very much appreciated. Move your butt, Deena. I got it now.

Walked the dogs for fifty minutes tonight and then took a half hour back ride. I peddled the entire time, no coasting for me. My legs can feel it, too. Mona gave me her bike when she moved and I rode it tonight. It is like "Tubby" from my youth. Big seat for my butt and big tires. It rode so smooth. Thank you Mona.

We have hardly been home these last two weeks. Since Neal dislocated his knee cap, we have been to many doctors appointments and now are going to physical therapy three times a week. His knee is getting better slowly but surely, so that is a good thing. He really wants to play football this fall, I am just not so sure. What's a mom to do?

I am off to bed now, I have tomorrow off and have lots of house chores to do. All bedding is being washed and hung on the line. Nothing smells better than freshly dried sheets. Dogs need baths and I need to weed the garden and water all the plants. Then, I get to clean house. We are having a cook out on Saturday evening and I want the house to look at least a little presentable.

Hopefully, when I get up tomorrow I will have lost a little more weight. It would be a good way to start the holiday weekend, giving me motivation to eat the right foods. I'll let you know.

Have a great Independence Day. God Bless America!!!!!